It’s me again! These few nights – I kept hearing her cry to herself. It’s quite sad for me, this time, she’s quite hurt. I still don’t know why. All I can do is just sit next to her to accompany her and tell her that she’s not alone.
I think she’s really fragile – she seemed so strong – because she tells her self everyday “Be strong Jolene”... but deep inside, she’s not.
I’ve been with her for 6 years now.. ever since I was the baby when she held onto me tight saying “Chai chai.. that’s going to be your name..” She looked into me with those dreamy eyes of hers, that moment of time – She was so happy. I miss those sets of eyes.
I don’t know what love is.. I guess it’s really tough – looking at how she goes through her tears whenever she’s not happy and sometimes she laughs in her dreams. But she should realize that there are so many other people who loves her in different way – but it’s still love.
She knows that... cause I see her talking to herself sometimes, I’ll never forget this moment I had with her... just few days ago.... She came home looking all tired .. “Baby, you know I love you, I know you know I’m sad. It’s just so tough in this world... I’m glad I have you to hug when I come home.” She lied next to me the same position I was lying down looking at me and fell asleep...